Fine propaganda.

I can't really say I'm enjoying the title The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding.

This is not to say it doesn't contain some good and helpful information. But it's produced by La Leche League International, and let me tell you, these people are propagandists of the most skilled order. I'll take their information, but the multiple "testimonials" sprinkled throughout the text are almost more than I can stand. Consider:

"When I was two, my mother came home from the hospital cradling two mysterious bundles wrapped in soft blue blankets. One was my new baby brother. She handed me the other. Underneath the folds of that soft blanket was a beautiful doll, which my mother explained would be my special baby...

Twenty-five years later I gave birth to my first child. The day I came home, I sat in our wooden rocking chair, and as I held my son close and nursed him, he opened his eyes to gaze at me. At once, an overpowering recollection of that early childhood memory returned, and tears began to flow as I realized, 'THIS is what I have waited my whole life to do!'" (p. 3.)

Oh, brother. And that's just the first chapter. Numerous quotes follow, saying things like "my baby found the nipple all by herself!" "Latching is magical!" "Breastfeeding is the only reason to go on living!"

Okay, I made that last one up. But you get the idea. Call me cranky (you won't be the first to do so, or the last) but I'm looking for the breastfeeding manual with quotes like this:

"Like everything else in life, at times breastfeeding's going to be pretty tricky, and at times quite annoying, but hey, it can be good for the baby, and sometimes you might get a kick out of it, so hang in there."

Can anyone suggest a book like that for me?

Comments

[lesbrarian]

Women's Nonfiction: A Guide to Reading Interests (Zellers 2009, Libraries Unlimited) includes a section called "Pregnancy, Childbirth, and Nursing." There may be a few titles in there for you-- though honestly I'm not aware of any breastfeeding books that match what you're describing. Almost all of them have that dewey-eyed optimistic tone. The second called "Motherhood," on the other hand, includes some titles that are a little more down-to-earth, i.e. Life After Birth: What Even Your Friends Won't Tell You About Motherhood or It Gets Easier! And Other Lies We Tell New Mothers.

[Beth]

I've read neither, so not exactly a recommendation, but we have a book filled with testimonials, (hopefully not all overjoyed and euphoric about breastfeeding) called "Unbuttoned: Women Open Up About the Pleasures, Pains, and Politics of Breastfeeding" http://amzn.to/bmH2Xn
and then we have one that may be a bit more practical and less propagandizing, called simply "The Breastfeeding Book: Everything You Need to Know About Nursing Your Child from Birth Through Weaning" http://amzn.to/9AJj0I

Good luck :)

Beth

[Thomas at My Porch]

So glad that motherhood has taken away your happily cynical point of view.

[Bookie]

Practical Advice with a little snark, and a dose of cynicism? I haven't read this but it looks like something I would have read back when I was breastfeeding (or trying to).

http://www.amazon.com/Breastfeeding-Sucks-What-Mammaries-Miserable/dp/1593376286

...and stay away from those breast feeding Nazi's, next thing you know you'll be dressed in all white, wearing Nike's, and drinking "pepsi." Remember, cults aren't good for the baby.

[H]

My best friend liked this one: So That's What They're For!

http://www.amazon.com/Thats-What-Theyre-Definitive-Breastfeeding/dp/159337285X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1287428614&sr=8-1

She also recommended The Everything Breastfeeding Book.

(I breastfed too, but I confess to having liked La Leche League's book...)

[Angelique]

"Latching is magical!"??!? Er, no, it is NOT. Breastfeeding is one of the hardest things I've ever done. I was lucky to get some support from our public health nurses but I did call them bawling and threatening to "give my baby formula if you don't get someone to help me". Not my finest hour.

Hang in there, CR. You can do this.

[Rachael]

Are you really looking for a manual, or just more of a pick me up, with the occasional useful tip? My sister found Vicki Iovine's books (Girlfriends guide to...) fairly useful and amusing. Glad to see the cranky hasn't worn off, CR. Hope the little man is happy, healthy, and sleeping well. Or at least the first two.

[lesbrarian]

David Sedaris's new book, Squirrel Seeks Chipmunk, is filled with animal short stories. It's like Aesop on acid. For me it wasn't funny in a laugh-out-loud way, but the whole book was wry and ironic, and also short. Can't complain.

I mention this because there's one short story where two owl siblings observe a dairy cow nursing her calf. The sister owl yells out "Faggot!," which the brother owl corrects, explaining that "Lesbian!" would be the more appropriate oath, but that in fact neither one really works because there's nothing sexual about nursing. But the sister owl thinks all mammals are disgusting regardless.

That's the gist. I might be remembering the details wrong. It was last night that I read the book. Memories fade after time, you know.

[Citizen Reader]

All of you:
You are the best. Thanks for all the suggestions--I particularly am interested in the "Breastfeeding Sucks" title (of course) but I will be checking out the others too. As always--I ask for something, I get a ton of great answers. Can't ask for anything more.

Lesbrarian--I'm on hold for the Sedaris title. Can't wait...and now can't wait even more (if that makes sense).

[Amy]

Eh. Propaganda is never fun, even if you fully agree with the points being made! I hope you can find something better - I have nothing to suggest unfortunately.

[Heidi Colquhoun]

We have recently added a book by Melissa Macdonald to our collection - Breastfeeding : real mums tell you how

"All you need to know to feed your baby - breast and bottle plus real stories from mums who could and mums who couldn't no guilt no pressure, realistic advice for today's mums"

I know exactly what you mean about the 'propogandists' some members of Breastfeeding Australia can be a little zealous. A dear friend, who I otherwise admire greatly, dismayed me once. She was working as a community midwife at the time, visiting newly delivered mothers in their homes. She told me the ones who were not breastfeeding were wasting her time.

I have had two experiences of breastfeeding myself. My first time was with my twin boys (now 18). It took me a good 6-8 weeks of persistence and tears and pain to get the breastfeeding under control.

By the time I'd had our surprise daughter 8 years later, I'd also had a breast reduction. With the assistance of the Lactation Consultant at the hospital and the support of my aforementioned friend who bought me a membership to BA, I tried to breastfeed my daughter. I tried 16 harrowing weeks of breastfeeding with a supply line stuck to my nipple before having to concede it was making life too hard and miserable for both baby and me. At sometime during that 16 weeks I was at a BA meeting and fed my baby with a bottle - the supply line was too difficult when not at home. One of the other women said to me, "Urgh, does she like that (bottle milk)? How can you feed her that?"
Need I say I didn't go back.

Heidi

[LynneW]

Two suggestions:

1. Fiona McArthur (http://fionamcarthur.com/) has a just-released book - The Don't Panic Birth Guide; I don't know if it's available in the US but if you emailed her (you can tell her I sent you) she'd probably have great advice for any specific question you might have. She's wonderful, very supportive and a practicing midwife.

2. I know a full-time lactation consultant who is also very generous with advice; I could put you in touch with her if you email me.

[Citizen Reader]

Oh, my, Heidi,
Who are these woman who say such mean things to other women ("does she like formula?," etc.). The way I see it, these things are tough, and as long as you gave it your best college try, which it certainly seems you did (I've seen pictures of those supplementer tubes, and holy cow, what a pain), I can't fault you for going with what works. We all have our ideas about children and child care, but maybe we could go a little easier on each other. Thanks for the stories! And might I just say: twins? Holy god. How anyone breastfeeds twins is BEYOND ME.

Lynne,
Thanks for another great suggestion! As well as for the offer of a lactation consultant consult. I have numbers to call here too--lactation types do do a good job of offering help, I must say--and things are actually going fine. You know me. I just like to read about four books on subjects I'm thinking about--I was reading more for information and future insight than because we were having real problems. I also just had to chuckle at the completely "dewy" tone (as the Lesbrarian would say) of the La Leche book.

[Molly]

The Ultimate Breastfeeding Book of Answers: The Most Comprehensive Problem-Solution Guide to Breastfeeding from the Foremost Expert in North America by Jack Newman(he's Canadian)was loaned to me from a trusted friend and it is great for things like which medicines are OK to take while nursing. Some stuff is just crap, though. Take what you can from it.

[Citizen Reader]

Molly,
You had me at "he's Canadian." Thanks!

[Rebecca]

2nd to the Breastfeeding Sucks book. All of her books are pretty funny while being practical as well.
Not breastfeeding, but, my all time favorite baby book is "Heading Home with Your Newborn: From Birth to Reality". Although you're past needing that one, now. It's the best because it's friendly advice without being too scary - I got so tired of reading books that yelled at me on every page - DANGER, THIS WILL KILL YOUR BABY!! crap.
Oh, and do yourself a favor - stay away from anything Penelope Leach writes. (see http://knowitallmama.blogspot.com/2010/09/penelope-leach-can-suck-it.html)

[Rebecca]

oops, the link above should be to http://knowitallmama.blogspot.com/2010/09/penelope-leach-can-suck-it.html
for some reason, it put my end parentheses in the link.

[bybee]

I remember the day before my son was born...the La Leche leader in our town saw my pregnant stomach after nearly walking by me without noticing.

"Watch this," I told my mom. She nodded.

LLL did a double-take and practically broke her neck running back across the mall to breathlessly ask me about my feeding intentions.