Citizen Reader

Dear Random House:

God, do you suck.

Can you tell me why you chose to have some author bother writing a book called The Triumph of the Thriller: How Cops, Crooks, and Cannibals Captured Popular Fiction? I mean, it's a good idea and all. I was very excited to read it, because I am nerdy and like to read books about reading. Before I settled in to read the whole thing, I wanted to check what the author said about James Patterson, because I hate James Patterson (mainly because he's, as one of the characters in the movie "Office Space" referred to Michael Bolton, a "no-talent ass clown."). I know that also makes me nerdy. Still.

So imagine my consternation when I flipped to the index to research Patterson and found THAT THERE WAS NO INDEX.

I ask you, what the hell is the point of a book like this if you're not going to offer an index?  You think a whole ton of pleasure readers are out there dying to pick up a book titled The Triumph of the Thriller? Somehow I doubt it. Students, researchers, librarians, nerds like me, that should have been your bread and butter.

And do you know what nerds like me say to books that need indexes and publishers who don't provide them? Fuck you, you cheap bastards. After all, just because I'm a nerd doesn't mean I don't believe in profanity.

Sincerely,

Citizen Reader